A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.”

Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.

After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.

As she watched, he approached the dresser and retrieved the note.

After a brief interval, he write down a message on it, then promptly dialed a number on the phone.

“Finally, she’s gone… Yes, I’m well aware, it’s about time. I’ll be on my way to see you. Wear that beautiful nightie, won’t you?”

I love you…can’t wait to see you…we’ll do all the naughty things you like.”

He hung up, grabbed his keys, and left.

She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed.

Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote…

…

..

“I can see your feet. We’re outta bread: be back in five minutes.”

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A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars

A 6th-grade teacher posed the following problem to one of her arithmetic classes:

“A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars.

One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity.

Now, what does each get?”

After a very long silence in the classroom, one little boy raised his hand.